I’ve been off my game and on the depressed side this past
week. Today, I finally figured out
why. For the past four years, I have
spent the majority of my time in a constant state of motion. Walking to class, the DC, etc., running into
different people every day, going on rounds, frantically finishing up
assignments at the last minute. I never
had a moment to breathe. Well, I have
plenty of time for that now, and I don’t like it. I enjoyed the peace for about a week. Now, my life is stagnant.
There is little to do, and less people to do it with here in
the Upper Valley . I mean, at least at school, I could just
wander into the RA Office or the DC and find people to just sit and hang
with. For free, at that! Here, not so much. Unless I want to take up hiking, but that’s
not going to happen. And most of the
people I used to know have moved away, the ones that are still here have lives
of their own. So, I am bored and lonely. It kinda sucks.
Even though I always saw familiar faces at Keene ,
it was always a different set. I never
knew who I was going to run into any given day, and while I had certain
routines down each semester, every day brought something different, some new
challenge. Here, I see the same 6 people
every.damn.day, and do pretty much the same thing every day, too. Even when I’m working different “areas” at
work, I’m still glued to the lobby. I
was so psyched to usher yesterday, because at least that way I got to walk
through the theatres every now and then…
I miss the college environment. A lot.
I am still applying for ResLife jobs, and still not getting very
far. Hopefully the latest one I applied
for will pan out for me. If I seriously
have to spend the next year trapped in the lobby of the movie theatre, I might
just kill myself.
I am desperately trying to stay positive, tell myself that
one year is not very long, but it’s only been a month since I graduated, and it
feels like so much longer. Time has come
to a screeching halt, and I am ready for it to start moving again. So, I am praying that I get this job. Or anything, really, that involves more. *Sigh*.
Time to get ready for another mundane day…
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